Saturday, August 07, 2004
do i still have a place in your cold heart?? a small one?? i know i dont..cos ur heart is cold and wont be touched by whatever people do..i am jus a fucking idiotic stupid person to fall in love with you...is that wat u think??whatever...maybe i should not even put u in a small place of my fucking heart..yea i am evil...everyone know sthat..but i dont care..maybe ping is right..i am self centered thinking of doing things only for the good of myself...but for this matter...i dont know wat to do..am i supposed to bury myself to my knees and cry every night thinking of you?? no...this is crazy...maybe i will do that last time but not now...everyone will change..i know that logic.. but i have never seen someone who changed as fast and different as you...this is totally fucking crazy.. whatever..i am going to enjoy myself tomorrow...seeing the fireworks going off in a few minutes.. riding on all the theme park games..forgetting bout you at least for one day..i was not able to do so these few years..but i will be able to do it now...well onli for one day but at least i improve and the feeling will jus fade away...anyway it will be your last year and i ownt be able to see u again and i will be able to forget you totally...this is possible..i may be saying this for these few years but this time i know i'm gonna do it...i must have the determination and forget bout you...as soon as you are out of my mind and my fucking cold and black heart...i will be able to be free and lively all over again..yea...jus carry on with your life and your cold heart.
