Designer: LGM
Codings: Manikka
Images: 1 2 3 4
Brushes: 1 2

here i am in school blogging...it's the last period of class and i'm so so so so bored.. nothing to do so blog...it seems i haven blog for 6 days?? i dont know...didnt count.. well...mum birthday on saturday..went to chinatown to celebrate for her and to "experience" the roadside stalls..well..extra member in my family!! STEPHANIE!!.. muhahaha..she went with us there and me and her were like looking out for sour food.. haha...we ate many things...like wat we call ngoh hiang?? or whatever that kinda food.. the famous city satay which was promoted by city beat before and then the oyster food which looks like carrot cake and caroo cake..haha...my father's fav food...and then went shopping around...hmmm....drank this lime and lemon juice...when u see the name.. it's supposed to be sour and ncie right..for girls lahz...but then it seems tasteless to the both of us u know..it's like...hmmm plain water...lol...but u should see the look of my father's face...well..this proves that MOST of the girls or women loves lime and lemon things right..well maybe the exception of a gay..lol...hmmm....nothing much happen the rest of the time..holidays are over..cant believe it...haix...got a very sad news...he got a stead now...i should be forgetting him now eh...it's been almost four years...wish him and his girl..happy always!! from the bottom of my heart..as for my relationship...haven decided what to do with him... 'm so disapointed with him...everything he does...well..maybe it's because i still comapre him with eugene eh...haix...so sad...u cant do anything to help this situation u know.. i dont know....shit...it's over...everything's finally over...

finally...went shopping today...first went to meet mei make my contact lens..waoh... in the beginning of the day..i spent 30 bucks..haha..my lens cost that much...then later on meet toot...then the three of us went orchard shopping...i bought my shopaholic and sister book for 25 bucks...then...we went to crepes and cream at hmv to eat...then went shopping again....then bought ear rings..haha...had a side cos mei take another side..haha...then...wat else i bought?? haha..oh yah..presents for my mum...haha... then reach home at around 8...haha...finally i did my shopping and enjoyed myself so much.. haha...finally...

haix...i feel so wat now...no words can describce my depression...i dont actually have to show everyone that i am depressed...even when u talk to me on the phone..i still give u that cheerful voice of mine...entertain u guys...this time round...so much depression.. dont know wat happen...thinking of HIM and him both of them..even though i know comparing them together are wrong but i jus cant help myself to do it...i cant stop myself..all the past memories start flowing back into my mind..i think y euegene can do this for me but he cant...i think y i and eugene together very happy but not with him...i dont know...i dont see problems in my past relationships but i see a very big one now...i haven start to realise wat that problem is but i can actually sense something big is going to happen.. wat is going to happen i dont know cos i cant predict the future...but i can jus sense it..things are going big this time...maybe i didnt love him as much as i did to him..maybe i jus took him as a subsitute maybe this maybe that..i jus cant seem to make a decision to whatever i do...things are going real bad...family problems and relationships problems...too many come all at a time for me to manage and i know i cant manage things well...everyone in my class knows that eh...whatever...i jus cant do things well and perfect to reach everyone's expectations...i jus cant...

haix...i am afraid of being alone..i am afraid of no one caring bout me..i am afraid of everything...i am so afraid..so afraid..haix...i wanna go out shop shop shop...who is going to help me there...he is not there for me already and i'm totally dead..i need someone by my side to help me support me..but no no one.. omg...so it's jus me stella being alone in my small little world...someone grab me out of the world and bring me out to see the big big world...

haix..i think my life is a total disaster...i shouldnt be here to give u all bloody problems...and u broke ur promise..am i going to trust u again...u broke my trust..i wish my pillow was him.i wish i was dead...argh...this is wat i feel now...haix...i should thanks her for her "expensive" shoes...but not in the way that u know u are wrong and u are still scolding me and giving excuses to protect urself...wat am i to do..

today..hmm...went out with my mum..finally bought my shoes..haha..my charles and keith shoes...omg..i love them like hell..well maybe for the time being wahahaha...it costs a big bomb with 35 bucks for jus a pair of sandals...well maybe not a lot..but to my mum.. ya know...old ppl think that kind..haha...went in to the bra shop..omg..cant believe wat i saw...there was this guy who came in and was so paiseh until the whole face red..haha.. then he told the salesgirl he wanted to buy bra for girlfriend...haha..so funny..then the salesgirl asked him want sexy de or wat...u know wat he said..he wanted the girl to wear it at night..omg..haha..i was laughing like hell man....omg..cant believe got this kinda perverts walking along singapore..haha..didnt buy others..dont have much to buy..oh yah and a few pair of ear rings..that's it..great singapore sale and so pathetic..nothing to buy actually..all same stuffs...but i wanna go shopping with my friends...when can i do it before school actually starts when it is like next week?? omg...holiday over so fast..and my homework is like not even half done?? so lazy to do man..so bored...argh.

things hasnt been too well for me these few days eh...everything goes wrong and everything i mean..but it turn for the better and it better stay this way...

ok...so we had our bbq yesterday and the atmosphere was like hmmmm..u know...not very nice..ppl having blacky face and attitude stuff going on in the air influencing others to have the same mood too...i was like??wat am i supposed to do u know...omg...ok..whatever..the bbq has past and it's a brand new day again...some stayed at my house...ppl like clair toot tsz fai and han xiang...i guess i was the first one to fall asleep??well..cant help it..i was standing there all the time doing all those bbq thingy cooking for them...haix...slept on the floor yesterday night...and my back is bloody aching now..head hurts..arm hurts but wanted to blog down wat i feel...haix.. whole body aching should be the right word for me to say..eh...whatever lahz...things seems to start wrong since holiday started...seriously doesnt like this feeling but wat can i do..it's all fated right as u all might say it..but cant i change the awkard situation???cant do anything??have to crack my brains...and also to think bout wat to do bout my relationship...haix..talking bout that..i feel like crying already...it's like omfg ok...he asked me why i didnt message him...well cant he like message me first.. and does he understand wat i feel...does he understand i have to go to bloody school during holidays and have to go out with my friends...i cant scarifice my friends jus because of him ok...if it is this way..i rather would have my friends not him..he asked me to give him a chance..and here it is but he doesnt do anything..wat can i do right..i can onli be alone and think of all those things that has not been going on in my life right.. maybe i shouldnt compare him so much well maybe shouldnt compare him with eugene right.. but whenever i talk to him..i cant help thinking bout eugene and all those times we have..how i wish i can fall off the cliff jus like reno in snow angel and forget all those things and start my life all over again!! it's impossible i know..but maybe i can do it myself by jumping off somewhere high right...shity hell...wat am i going to do now.. give me some advice and psyhco me to think right.......

haix...wanted to blog yesterday..but didnt wat happened to the bloody server..ok..whatever..having the bbq today...and it seems a lot of univited guests wanna come...but it seems obvious it is onli like the 2 classes onli right..whatever lahz.. went to giant to buy all those food yesterday...quite funny and people are pissed at the saem time..relax girls..haix...hope it will turn out good eventually lohz...aiyo.. problems always crop up last minute eh..haha..but at least i solve it right...luckily lohz...hmmm...waiting for my friends go come my house to bitch around with me and play all those cards..real bored now..nothing for me to do...

haiyo..holidays are jus so boring...back to sch..home..sch home...not much of shopping and outing actually...except the one of the sentosa outing whick is like weeks ago..omg.. how i wish i can i can grab all my money and rush out to shop...i haven shop for weeks..ok...not meaning buying things..wat i mean is proper shopping with friends...hanging out like wat we should after exams??yup..but i guess is impossible...u know..my mum..lucky she's not gonna be at home tml..wahahaha...anyway.. i also have to go shop for the bbq stuff right..haha..happy for wat..whatever..i hop i seriously can enjoy myself during the bbq...its been a long time since i enjoyed myself.. well i said that jus now right..whatever..haha..he's driving me crazy and been asking me questions since we were together..and it is a little well mybe a lot..it is very irritating to me...quetions like..so u really love me..what the fuck..omg...wat is seriously happening...y is he always asking me this kinda questions.. i mean it's a little stupid isnt it?? yah..the..so it is like...omg lohz...i odnt like this kinda like u are suspicious of me??whatever...wat should i do?? we've been together for like not long and problems are beginning to happen..y cant we be like other couples.. happily together...or whatever...stop forcing me to do things i dont like...

haix...i feel so irritated by him..it's not fun flooding my screen and all those things ok...u know i am not in a good mood right...instead of consolling me u are there irritating me..omg...wat is happening now..shit man...how i wish ppl would stop irritating me when i'm in my bad mood...haix..maybe i'm over-reacting or whatever.. but.. i jus hope u can stop doing wat u are doing to me now...it is sort of torturing me now u know...

omg..tolerate with me ok..i'm a little crazy and deppressed after taking my results..hmm.. it sucks..belive me u would neber want this kinda results ok.. i onli pass my english and cheena which is like "the..i always pass this wat" BUT those were the onli subjuects i pass...imagine it..after i came back from sch..imagine my mum scolding me??omg..i cant stand it..

Congrats! Your a Pure Angel! Angels, as far as most
of them go, are all compatabile creatures, but
Pure ones simply are symbols of God. Pure
Angels always appear when a child is born, when
a rainbow is seen, or when someone shares their
first kiss. They never grow old, an can appear
in the shape of a naked woman with white, bold
wings. Pure angels are the carriers of god, and
show their love to everyone in the world.


What Kind of ANGEL are you? (For Girls only) This Quiz has amazingly Beautiful Pictures!
brought to you by Quizilla

You have a Calm Soul! Being calm and cool is what
you do best. You collected thoughts and always
positive attitude make you very bright and
logical. When theres a problem, you know how to
approach it, and solve it. Your friends rely on
you on their problems, and your shoulder for
their crying. You are peaceful, and enjoy
nature and freedom. You rarely get angry and
hardly scream, which makes you good with kids.
You seem to be in tune with the world and if
anything goes wrong, you always bounce back.


What Kind of SOUL do you posses? (For Girls only) Incredible Anime Pictures!
brought to you by Quizilla

Shiro Momoko: You're genki as hell and helpful all
the time. You don't mean to but you tend to
drive people crazy. But Kurobara-san and
Tsumetai-san seem to put up with you
anyway,because under it all you're a really
great person.


Which Primary are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

You're very very depressed. Not really. You want to
look depressed so people will pay attention to
you. You're not manic Depressive. You don't
suffer from Melancholia. You're just a sick,and
you're probably Histronic.You sick bastard.All
you want is for people to love you,because
you're too stupid to go out and make something
of yourself.Let go of the pity party and go be
a cheerleader. You're about the same.


How Depressed are You?
brought to you by Quizilla



omg..i am seriously like that??shit..omg...wat is happening??

-Perfect- You're the perfect girlfriend. Which
means you're rare or that you cheated :P You're
the kind of chick that can hang out with your
boyfriend's friends and be silly. You don't
care about presents or about going to fancy
placed. Hell, just hang out. You're just happy
being around your boyfriend.


What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla



wahaha...got this from mei blog..hope she doesnt blame me eh?? haha...hmm..quite tue i guess

You are a child's kiss. Completely sweet and
innocent and pure. You mean no harm and only
love in your sweet kisses.


What kind of kiss are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

omg...y did i tell u that..i thought i told u today u wont get a bloody shock over my results tml..but wat did u do..in thr beginning u didnt scold me..and i was feelin so guilty..but later on..u nag nag nag nag...ok..my n levels are not here yet..so stop saying i will not pass it ok..i hate it lahz....whatever..u dont understand wat i'm going through because u have NEVER went through all this bloody stress ok..haiyo..say so many things u also dont understand...u always say i was in ur tummy for 9 months and u know wat i'm thinking but i think u are totally wrong..doesnt mean ur life in the past was tough..means my life also needs to be like that..i dont wanna have a deprived childhood..understand

omg...i haven blog for like 2 days?? didnt even get to touch my com even the mouse or the keyboard ok...because there are overbroad selfish idiotic madness ppl..omg..who is it tada...the..my brother in my house..argh..i hate him...shit lohz..i am not able to do all my stuffs lohz...now i can come online onli reason he not at home...omg..wat is the world coming to...omg...and the problem is i cant go to so many websites...argh..omg.. i am killing myself ok...